Christmas and The Holidays (16)

Before my year would start in 2001, I, along with many others in the Home would have to get through Christmas. It was hard, everyone in the Home would be without their families, they would have to be there in the Home for Christmas and nobody was allowed to go home. The staff at the Home would do their best to make us all feel special; they would take us to see A Christmas Story at a theater in the city, and would take us to dinner and to see Christmas lights around neighborhoods. Our dorm mom, Ms. Bobbi, would let us decorate our dorm rooms for the holidays and we had fun.

Being a part of the regular holiday activities helped us all deal with being homesick and missing our families. Even though I was quickly finding out what a decent average family was and that my family wasn't like average families, I was homesick for mine. Christmas was special for me, it was the one time where we all acted decent, where the adopted mom was actually kind. Looking back though, I wondered if it was sincere though, or was she just being nice because it was for Matthew? I couldn't be sure but I would hold on to the idea that Christmas was special, to me anyways.

 Christmas at the Home would be hard though, I missed Jacob and I missed my Dad. But, I wouldn't see my family or really hear from them at Christmas, not that it surprised me. While we waited for Christmas Day to arrive, we would all be busy around the Home getting ready for the day and I would start getting a bit closer to Jonsey. I shouldn't have been getting closer but I was, I liked the attention and I liked feeling noticed. I guess I was just getting comfortable at the Home and with everybody there, including most of the staff. I was liked pretty much all over the Homes, I just had the ability to get along with about anybody, I was friendly and just liked people. I was finding out that I was a people person, probably was along but at home I was not allowed to be around people or talk to them.

Finally, Christmas would come, we would open and exchange presents in the living room in the Dorm. Most of the girls had family send them Christmas presents, the rest of us who didn't really have much of a family, had people outside the home that would volunteer to send gifts to us. My friend Jessica’s mom would send me a few gifts, usually when they sent her mail her mom would include me as well, she was so sweet. The adopted mom sent me a small, desk, daily devotional calendar and that was it. I guess she felt like she had to send me something or it would make her look bad to the Home and she wouldn't do that. I was disappointed but again, not surprised, but my disappointment would be short lived that Christmas Day. After the others had opened their gifts, Ms. Bobbi said she had one for me and she kind of made a big deal about it. As the girls circled around me, she handed me a gift that was wrapped and encouraged me to open it as she held a camera. I opened it and found a flute. I was so surprised and moved to tears, I could not believe it. It was a flute, in a hard case and it was mine. I was told that someone affiliated with the Home had bought it for me; they had heard somehow that I used to play and have one. As I opened the hard case, I pulled the three pieces out and quickly put it together. The room got quiet as I started to play, if I remember right I just started playing Amazing Grace by ear and I distinctively remember a sense of peace in my heart come on as I had found music again.

 Music was therapy for me, always had been and now that I had my flute, the one thing I knew how to do I felt like I was going to be okay. I was in a safe place there at the Home, I had friends (and apparently friends I didn't know about), I had Ms. Bobbi, I had my flute and I was going to be okay. I didn't know what the future had in store but I knew I was going to be just fine.

Until next time, be blessed and inspire to make a difference!
~The Adopted Child